From pieces to peace! by Neha Kulkarni

"Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves."
Have you ever felt suffocated that you just wanted to break free? No matter how much you tried, you just couldn’t sort out your life. With this baggage, I went to the land of Lamas and rediscovered myself. This is my story and maybe yours too.       
We crossed the borders and entered Jammu and Kashmir. I think I left all my worries back in Himachal Pradesh because all of a sudden I felt lighter. I couldn’t get any network on my cell phone and I guess that was a blessing in disguise. I’m a techno-freak and not being able to get in touch with people makes me feel disabled. Somehow it didn't matter anymore. I was already on my soul searching journey and no one could stop me. I spoke to my mother just twice during those ten days just to let her know I was fine.  The monasteries were beautiful and they had an aura to them. I could just go there and look at the city for hours together and not get enough of it. 


The cold desert of Nubra Valley is best place if you want to have a conversation with yourself. The silence there was so blissful that I sat there in the middle of the desert and wasn’t bored. We found the double humped camels here. I took a ride on these camels just so I would be there in the desert and all I could hear was the whistling of the wind and the tinkling of the bells that were tied around the camel’s neck. It’s difficult to explain but it had a soothing effect which just calmed my senses. Emotions like hate, frustration, nervousness and anger became a distant memory. They were replaced by love, faith, peace and the wish to live life to the fullest and take chances just to follow my dreams. My visit to the Pangong Tso was wonderful. The vastness of the lake is striking. There were so many people there and it was like a fish market – quite noisy, but I somehow couldn’t hear them beyond a certain point. I was so deep in thoughts that I just sat there at the bank listening to the water and foreseeing my life here on. The whole self exploring journey ended with river rafting in the Indus and Zanskar River. I asked myself, why was I so scared to take chances in life? It’s only after I take chances would I know whether things are going to work or not. As I was deep in thought and enjoying the ride, the rafting guide asked whether anyone wanted to jump in the river. No one around me wanted to. I just put my oars aside and jumped in. The water was icy cold and I couldn’t breathe for a moment but before I knew it I was fine. I repeated the same thing when we crossed over and into river Zanskar. You see even though initially I was breathless I was fine in an instance. So why was I so scared?